Essay 1 or Essay 2?

I have chose to revise essay 1. I believe my second draft of my essay is well organized and there are excellent points of why the document fails. There are some things that can be improved. It was the first essay we wrote for the class and I feel now I have more knowledge of what a well written technical document should include. As I state the failure points I need to expand on why those points make the document unsuccessful. There needs to be more expansion on why this particular technical document should be fun and exciting for viewers. Also, the contrast of the document needs to be improved and expanded on explaining why the contrast is so bad. Overall, I think essay 1 is a good choice to revise.